Keegan started HIS gymnastics class also this week. He was SO excited! I on the other hand was nervous. You know, as a mom you have a bazillion questions go racing through your mind in the car all the way there; will he behave? Is he going to hurt someone? Will there be any boys in his class? Am I setting him up to ‘not be manly’ if there aren’t any other boys? Will he be shy? Will he listen to his teachers? Will he hurt anyone? Will he be nice? Will he hurt anyone? Will he hurt anyone? You know, and that list just kept going on and on until I remembered what a friend of mine told me. SO I stopped my racing brain (one that seems to work faster than most people I know when it come to worry or sarcasm!) and said a prayer taking hold of God’s truth and I released Keegan to be who God wants him to be and not who I’m worrying that he’ll be. After all…I’m REALLY NOT in charge!
He was talking big in the back himself, looking back I think it was to help him ‘be brave’ I heard him tell Ella, “So, I’ve been so good at gymnastics my whole life Ella, cause I’m so strong!” We did say a quick prayer before we went into the building. We asked God to be with Keegan, keep him safe, and help him be brave!”
The second we walked in I could almost feel the pull within him. One second he wanted to scream out of excitement the next he wanted to hide behind me and not come out. It was interesting to watch. Ella must have seen it too cause she grabbed his hand and took him over to the shoe boxes and told Keeg this is where his shoes and drink go. He got them off and whispered in my ear, “Mommy, can you do this with me?” I looked down at him and smiled and said just hang out here with mom until we see your teacher.
It’s funny how the feelings I had at times like this come racing back to ME as I watch Keegan struggle with those same feelings. What’s even funnier is how I want to get irritated at HIM for having the same feelings that I struggled with as a kid…poor guy. Don’t get me wrong I’m not assuming that others don’t feel shyness or struggle with this lack of confidence. I’m just saying it was just one of the things I fought and still fight with when new situations happen! I was on the outside watching his feeling form wanting to break it for Keegan.
The teacher came out, he looked at me and I could read his mind he was getting ready to tell me he can’t do this. So before he had the chance, I wisped, “You have a choice. You can stay here with mom and we’ll have to go home and you won’t get to do gymnastics, or you can take courage from God and go out there and try it this one time! I’m here cheering you on!” And he turned from me and walked out to the floor without a second thought!! That teacher pulled him in and he did GREAT!! Later she set up stations in a huge circle and let the kids run crazy!! One station was a somersault on the wedge. He again struggled cause he’d never don this and this involved more then just running and jumping. He grabbed the teacher and hid behind her leg. She asked him what was up and he just told her I can’t do this. She helped him do it 2 times and then sent him on his way again…next thing you know she’s having the other kids watching him! He quickly became the monkey boy beast that I knew he’d be if you just tried! Now he’s on his way to the Olympics!! Ha!!
Now he can’t even wait to go do gymnastics again!! He’s asked me every morning, “Hey Ma, is this the day I do MY gymnastics day?”
Thank you Lord Jesus for the strength to be brave when times seem overwhelming and scary!
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